"The Bank Job", not a bad job

Don't let the "Based on a true story" caption fool you. The Bank Job has exactly what you expect from entirely fictional heist pictures (kinda makes you wonder...).

Basically, if you take Ocean's 11, add some Snatch, throw in just a dash of Sherlock Holmes and the Red-Headed League, and cut out pretty much all the humor, you've got The Bank Job. It's the story of a small time, loanshark-ridden used car salseman named Terry (Jason Stratham, not fighting for once and not acting as always) who gets a tip about a bank whose alarms will be down for one week, leaving the safe deposit boxes in the vault up for grabs. Being a family man, Terry makes the smart choice for his wife and daughters and takes the chance. He and his partner Martine (Saffron Burrows) bring in a little group of petty crooks and lowlife porn actors to help with the heist. Trouble is, our merry band of misfits don't know that they've been set up by a secret government operative who wants the contents of one of the safe deposit boxes destroyed with minimal government involvement. He's content to let our heroes have most of the goods at first, but he's willing to have our heroes quietly "erased" to protect the secret in the vault.

But that's just the beginning. The bank job has sent waves throughout London society that sets everyone from lords to drug lords, brothel proprietors to government agents, ruthless porn thugs to brutal black extremist groups, and cops both crooked and straight against our heroes. See, Terry and company just happened to pick the one closet in London where every powerful lowlife -from the street to the crown- stores there skeletons. Our heroes are in way over their heads and there only hope is to get out of this mess alive.

Stratham has a good screen presence, but he can't act well enough to pull off the emotional scenes with his very justifiably worried wife (one of only two characters with a hint of scruples). Also, the director uses shots of enhanced breasts way more than necessary. Yeah yeah, I get the point, crime is fun and sexy and has no consequences. Even so, this movie is one heck of a fun ride. There are no notable performances, but this movie is still good for its fast paced action and suspense.

Smarty Pants Sez: The Bank Job is recommended.

Caveats: This is a fun movie, but lacking in substance. If you want to see heart rending performances, or you really don't want to have a lot of silicone-laden nipples pushed in your face, don't see it.